Anger Management: Stay out of Jail and Divorce Court-From Mchenry and Elgin, IL | Men's Issues

By mshery
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The goal of anger management is to keep you, your family and others safe-emotionally and physically. When anger is not managed, but only blurted or acted-out, your emotional feelings are commandeered by the physiological arousal caused by the huge spikes in adrenalin, cortisol and other stress-inducing chemicals that take place.

These substances make you want to fight and hurt others. That makes unmanaged anger a truly drug or chemically-induced state. The good news is, however, that you can learn to control your rage even though you can't get rid of the things or the people that may cause it.

Are You Too Angry?

Tests are available that can measure the intensity of your angry feelings and how well you are able to control them. However, the chances are good that if you do have a problem with managing your anger, you already know it.

If you find yourself acting in ways that appear or feel out of control or frightening to yourself or others, you probably need assistance in finding better ways to deal with this very high risk and often dangerous emotion.

Why do Some People Appear More Out of Control than Others?

Some psychologists actually believe that because of genetics and hereditary factors, some people really are more "hotheaded" than others; that is, their initial spikes of anger lead them to get angry more easily and intensely than the average person might. There are also those who don't show their anger in loud spectacular ways but are chronically irritable and grumpy.

Easily angered people don't always curse and throw things; sometimes they withdraw socially, sulk or just get physically ill.

Do you have a low tolerance for obstacles? People who anger easily generally have a low tolerance for frustration; they feel that life should not be confronting them with obstacles, inconveniences or hassles. They have great difficulty taking obstacles in stride, and they get furious if they seem unjust.

In addition to genetics, what other factors may be influential in making people very easily angered?

Well, another set of factors may be sociocultural. We are taught that it is OK to express worry, fear and other emotions, but not anger. Consequently, some speculate that we fail to learn constructive ways of manage it.

We also know that family background is a factor. Frequently, people who are easily angered were raised in families that were particularly disruptive, dysfunctional or not adept at communicating feelings well.

Is It Good to be Totally Spontaneous and Honest All the Time?

This is a dangerous myth that many people still believe. Some people use this discredited assumption as justification to communicate in ways that hurt or diminish others.

Studies demonstrate that expressing all your anger spontaneously actually causes it to escalate and does nothing to help. The best advice is to first, identify what triggers your anger. Then when a triggering situation presents itself, have a good talk with yourself to keep it from tipping you over the edge.

About the Author

Dr Shery is in Cary, IL, near Algonquin, Crystal Lake, Marengo and Lake-in-the-Hills. He's an expert psychologist. Call 1 847 516 0899 and make an appt orlearn more about counseling at: http://www.carypsychology.com

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