Should Dieting Be Called "Liveting"? | Humor

By kphirst
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Word Count: 400

I understand the principles of dieting - use up more calories than you take in or take in fewer calories. No seconds, don't finish everything on your plate, chew every mouthful sixteen times - I know the rules. I just don't follow them all the time. That's why I'm thankful there aren't calories in my words - I might have to eat them.

Most nutritionists say to eat whatever you want, just eat in moderation. A dish of ice cream, a slice of cake, a few cookies - moderation can be immoderate depending on the size of the dish, the slice or the few. With sixty-two percent of Americans being overweight, the measure of a man has become the kitchen scale.

The closer our food is to its natural state, the healthier it is for us - beef instead of cheeseburgers, baked potatoes instead of french fries, milk instead of milkshakes. Although this made sense to me, I had to explain it to my sons. I had to explain that eating cheeseburgers, french fries and milkshakes that were made in their home state of California didn't mean they were eating those things in their natural state.

I tried to improve the meals I made at home by serving fish instead of meat, fresh vegetables instead of frozen ones and whole grains instead of potatoes. However, when I served tofu steak for dinner, my family let me know I'd served a mis-steak.

Drinking two glasses of water before eating leaves less room in your stomach for food. It's a do-it-yourself, temporary, stomach stapling without staples. Of course, there's a different kind of do-it-yourself, temporary, stomach stapling that causes problems. It's when white flour and sugar are the staples.

Maybe part of the problem with dieting is the word diet. Any word that contains the word die has a negative connotation, which could cause a negative attitude, which could be counterproductive to dieting. After all, at the end of a month we want to have lost more than thirty days.

Maybe the Surgeon General should get involved. The Surgeon General made cigarette manufacturers put health warnings on cigarette packages. Maybe he should make restaurants put health warnings on their menus to alert diners to the amount of calories, fat and sugar in the food. If it's true we are what we eat, at least that would help us to get to know ourselves better.

About the Author

KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life. Take a minute to make yourself smile at http://knightwatch.typepad.com

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